Now What?

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I find I am clutching my mug of steaming hot coffee a bit tighter lately, grabbing for the throw blanket to burrito myself in more often than usual, and procrastinating a little longer before rolling out of bed or stepping out of the scorching shower. Winter has officially set in for Long Island. BRRR!

The garbage is filled with empty cardboard hearts, yes plural, and a new blemish has erupted on my chin (which for me, is unusual). We have gone through several sketch pads, glue sticks and packages of construction paper in this house. The DVR is empty, every book has been read, the toys have been played with and Logos have been built. We have beaded necklaces and bracelets, molded Play-Doh into mini animal shapes and even practiced some school work.

Its only Monday! SIX MORE DAYS! Six more days the kids are home from school and the snacks are depleting at an astounding rate! Its too cold to go outside and after an unexpected vet bill, my budget is a bit tight.  (Doggie is doing fine now 🙂  )

Its only Monday! Now what?

If it was up to me, I’d remain a burrito all week long reading, writing and editing. Sigh . . but that will not satisfy four energetic children. So does anyone have any great suggestions?


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A Meditation . . .

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I wrote this some time ago, trying to describe the feeling of taking a warm shower after a long day.  I was hoping to capture the moment when I submerge my head in the water and drown out all sound.  For me, that is a place of clarity, where I can just let it all go.  Either that or I need to get out more. Well, either way, here it is.

A chill set deep inside my bones, muscles tense, mind running. I peel away my clothing until they are slouched at me feet. With the twist of a knob, my oasis awaits. The steam climbs up my legs, eventually clouding my vision. Putting my right foot forward, I step towards the pulsing water, letting it slip over my body like an oversized shirt. I am engulfed in its warmth. My thoughts are fleeting like every bead of water rushing down. The inner voice has drained my emotions with anxiety, worry, fear. The water vibrating my back allows me to relax, sighing out all which I cannot change. I surrender my head to the current. It is here where I find the silence. I am just the soul, seeking shelter as the water saturates my home. It is here I reside, safe and warm, unharmed and unaffected. I sit quietly watching, listening as the water pounces off, I can hear each solitary drop tap dancing and echoing within. The voices have vanished, leaving me as I am. Traveling within the walls my soul has been placed. Warmth, light, quiet and peace. I am. I am. I am.