Experiencing change is a tornado of feelings all swooshed and swirled together to form something that is unrecognizable. I feel flickers of fear, specks of uncertainty, swirls of excitement, dotted with anxiety, all circulating in happiness. The force of change has left me unable to secure my footing. Its fast pace has left me dizzy.
Although, this is a much welcomed change, in which I am in no means complaining, it has distracted me from writing, blogging and reading.
My all time favorite quote.
To my WordPress family, I am slowly returning, I am just in a growth spurt right now. 🙂
I blinked. . .
When I opened my eyes I was responsible for four precious human beings. As they sit all in a row, they look like an image of a life cycle you would find in a magazine, infant, baby, toddler and preschooler. One charming little boy followed by the three beautiful, graceful little girls adorned in pink with large bows atop of their silky hair. During this time I was on my feet all hours of the night and desperately trying to keep up throughout the day. I grew weary, filled with exhaustion, until my eyes felt so heavy, I blinked . . .
When I opened my eyes the eldest two children were standing tall, with their sacks slung on their backs, waving their small hands bye bye as they lift their foot on the step of the long, yellow painted bus. The two smaller girls were now running through my legs wildly, refusing naps, unable to be tamed. Feeling overwhelmed, I threw my hands up in the air, exhaled all of my frustrations and I blinked. . .
When I opened my eyes I was rushing through the morning routine, preparing lunches and snacks, tying shoelaces and packing library books. Chauffeuring the children from football and dance, muscling through to get the homework done. Some days its hard, feeling like a personal assistant to four people. I can get lost in the minutes of life as the weeks and months roll by. I find myself pausing a moment when I see my son reading to his younger sister or my daughters eyes sparkle with excitement and belief as the holidays approach. My eyes begin to sting a little and fill with tears of love, and as much I resist and refrain from wanting to, I hold out, taking in the wonderment of how special this life is, until I can’t fight the urge any longer, and I close my eyes.
I blink . . .